I met a friend for brunch on Saturday (mom brunch, which meant 9:15am because 11am normal brunch time is practically afternoon nap time these days) and we were discussing our mornings leading up to getting out of the house. Even though we left the kids at home with our husbands, we both had done plenty of rushing around to ensure that we could get out the door on time. For me that meant both A and I got up around 7. I fed Lucy, he took a shower. He got Lila up, dressed and changed. I helped her get settled in for breakfast and put Lucy back in her bassinet as I got changed for brunch. Then I took off. My friend said she had gotten up at 6am to shower, feed the baby, give the baby a bath, get her resettled, wake up her toddler, get him dressed and played with him for a little bit. And only then, at 8:30, did she wake up her husband, asking if he could get out of bed so that she could head out to brunch.
This story amazed me. Honestly, if one of us in this house sleeps until 8:30 while the other gets up at 6am, it is more likely that A will be up and I will be in bed. (This doesn’t happen very often, trust me.) I’m home on maternity leave now and pulling more of the household duties than I may normally do, but A is still a big part of everything. We BOTH get up with Lucy in the middle of the night – he changes her diaper, I feed her. Another mom in my newborn group said that her husband sleeps in the guest room so that he isn’t woken up by the baby each night. That just isn’t how things work in our family.
We each have our roles – I cook more and stay on top of the checking account. A takes out the garbage and is much better at putting away laundry than I am. Maybe it is because we are used to having equal roles – both working demanding full time jobs and then rushing home to be a family each night and therefore our roles don’t change that much while I am home. Or maybe I just got really lucky when I chose A to be my baby daddy, one who really sees our parenting as a partnership and one who would never think of sleeping until 8:30am on a Saturday.
PS Lila and Lucy – if both of you would like to sleep until 8:30am on a Saturday, your dad and I both equally agree that it would be cool. Go for it.